Free Martha!

Now that Martha has been found guilty, what will her sentence be?

Judge Cederbaum, picture this:

Martha Stewart, sentenced to 5 years in prison for rich people - a South Florida gated retirement community.

Martha is to be available 24-7 to assist residents with all their domestic needs - cooking, decorating, organization, crafts, etc. No request too small - all questions welcome. Martha is here to serve you.

She will prepare a formal dinner at a different home every night of the week, as well as host a monthly themed banquet for all residents and their guests.

Every Tuesday and Thursday night is "101s with Martha" at the clubhouse. Wednesday and Friday mornings, visit "Martha's Garden" for a live demonstration. Q&A to follow.

For housing, Martha will be provided with a modest condo, but no maid service.

Extreme community service - a good thing!